Flavia Ines
In as much it is here; in the room of the house, thank heavens that I can watch it so many times as it wants; I will be seated in front of her until they take it in you complete hours of afternoon. and Single What I will do when they take it and I has left? Already five hours ago passed away, two hour that lies like slept in its white coffin; dressed target in its veil and its crown, that is to say, he himself suit whereupon we married; profit not to understand because last night he was so happy, put the suit of weddings of forty years ago, forty years that they happened as if four had been single; the suit was put and it modeled it by all the room in as much I I watched it sharing his happiness from the bed. It kissed, saying to me time and time again to me “I will always want to you”.
To tell the truth, she had not changed, was same of ours the first days; loving and sweet, tonight more than ever she tried to make me remember happy moments of our lives.
I a little exhausted by the work of the day dozed while she tried to prevent it, soon seated to my side and it said to me in whisper: you remember the night to me of weddings; we fell asleep and clothes by the exhaustion and the tension of all the day yet; today we will make it equal. Then I felt that it embraced to me, kissed to me and soon I fell in the deepest dream.
How great this morning was my surprise when I woke up between its lukewarm arms that still they embraced to me like mimando to me, taking care of to me; I called it time and time again and it did not respond, seemed a sleepy virgin; apparently she knew that she would leave me and tried to take leave last night of my with capital joy, as she always lived. how coldly I was before his night of goodbye. As I can compensate as much happiness, as much mimo, as much taken care of; I without her am not nothing; I will not know like facing the life as of today.
I asked to him its sister who fixed it, that left the dress him, because perhaps what meant last night me when putting it to it it was that they buried it thus.
Now; after her What I can do? If with her everything to dead; to died the sky, the Earth, the sea and I am dying every minute; now single I have left to remember the moments, the days, the months and the years with her, forty years and we did not age anything, absolutely nothing and now I have aged forty years suddenly; to my mind the memories come from as I knew it, unforgettable they will be in my memory the day that I knew and the last night its life, because for her they were equal of happy. Never a moan, never reflected a pain in its face, never a sadness, never became ill, never a tear, never nothing that to me put sad, for that reason single I have left step by step to remember our lives of divine, huge, majestic love, which I will take it in my memory and my memory.
Before the presence of the goddess, my astonished eyes did not want to return to blink; nor a moment they wanted to close itself; to calm I wanted the heart that accelerated its march before so overwhelming beauty that night of June.
The clear image of its body sublimates was mixed with my fragile thought and my force was insufficient to separate it of my; I drew it in my memory, I burdened its name in my front and was born in my the solitude because I began to surprise it.
I do not suspect to the goddess the effect that its colossal presence caused in, I imagine that the fire which they spilled its eyes took to me to love it of once. Its name the brief poem of insurmountable beauty, the smoothest and pleasant music that my ears never listened. “FLAVIA INES” divine symphony adapted in only ten notes subtly single ten, those that so many times I sang next to the moon that night, and that so infinite peace experienced my being when pronouncing my lips the ten letters of its name.
Without realizing I watched thousand times; infinitely I watched it and each part hers was inlaid in the wild forest of my aim.
As fresh rain to the virgin mountain fell its black and fine hair on its mensurados shoulders, she was as wild a dawn filled with songs of birds their white front two luceros in the horizon is their soñadores eyes, of penetrating watched of matchless blinking.
I felt a desire of reverence under the fascinating spell of its glance. Nose, eyebrows, eyelashes seemed carved by the sagradas hands of the hacedor.
Its lips!
Ay! its fine lips, their red lips that delicious! To the distant spot I kissed them time and time again, its face of goddess handed drawn over my of shipwrecked sailor. Its sines Ay! its sines! Two small virgin hills, one in front of the other, its blouse was the green meadow that covered like a fine mantle with silk and wool.
My eyes touched their brief waist when it walked from a place to another one with movements windings.
She was thin, esbelta, of perfect stature, I appeared and one was to me with arrogance, before his eyes I felt that she would be I just like the others, that is to say: like man, one equal one to which we were there, my presence did not cause the most mini impression to him, did not deign in watching my face of poet shut in in the warm aureole of its imposing presence.
As the dove raises the flight left she without concerning nobody to him, like march afternoon when the night comes near; that night for her was not than one night more, I I was not more than a person, I am sure that nothing was in its thought of that encounter that stops my was something as well as a storm that all changed it.
Its image I am captive in my thought and my full bed of her, the anxieties catched to me and then it was impossible to me to conciliate the dream.
The following night, I caressed the idea to return to see that beautiful form of woman; they requested me my eyes, requested me my soul, it requested me my body and it sends me to the search; it was necessary to see it.
For the positive force of the man nothing is impossible, often it had read that phrase, and as of that moment I did mine.
I prepared my mind, fills it of phrases and selected words, I made a control to my closet, I selected a perfume, luster the shoes, cleaned the guitar, all I fixed it, nor a negative detail I wanted that it was.
That behind schedule I left house cheers watched to me in the display cabinets of the avenues, I was spring sun after a brief rain; I went to visit a friend who also was friend of her. I thought that he was beneficial to have a friend in common, my friend lived his house in front of and thence he could see it each dusk with his walk of goddess to walk by the house and until listening from time to time to sing angelical who left his lips and from the house he scattered like celestial music by the environs.
Every day submerged more to me in immense desire to have it and idealizaba.
All I was fixing, little by little already my presence to it was not to him strange because it saw me frequently.
A dusk of Julio I had it before my eyes, so close was of which I felt that his presence me achicharraba the soul; between phrases entrecortadas by the abrupt change of my nerves and my temperature, I said these words that still them memory as I pronounced them:
“if you allowed who my lips approached his, in one night of these in which the moon shines more loving than in last centuries, it guaranteed kisses to him ether to us”. It kept silence, did not pronounce nor a word I I was shamed a little, I thought that it had been an audacity but; those words were the unique ones that I found in my impoverished vocabulary and I said by far feeling to them; they left my like when it is spoken for the first time in serious.
Nevertheless, as of that day I felt that all change in its form and way to see me, from that day I began to feel that he watched to me I understood that no longer he was to him indifferent, and I did not lose a single opportunity to heighten his originality, things that always it likes the women “Who God blesses your beauty of incomparable woman”. “Which God illuminates your mind for morning when it returns to verte your lips pronounce my name to say that you love to me”.
They spent many days without it passed nothing important in my conquest, a man never knows what a woman thinks when one expresses to him what by her it feels, nevertheless, I I felt that what she thought on my was positive, I even got to affirm that I was an pleasant person to him, who felt well when she watched to me, when she listened to me to sing.
One night of November end I made another act of audacity with her, of course, time was a premeditaded subject; then without previous warning I arrived at its house, and there she was she, more beautiful than noon of whom it rains with sun, beautiful, delicate, surprised in addition by my arrival, smiling, with watched candies, and I felt that I was the bird when arrives at the nest after long flight hours, or better the fish when they return it to the river, impossible is perhaps to be able to explain what felt my heart, my being, when I felt its glance to accidentar itself with mine.
That night we spoke of everything, maintained conversation, pleasant, warm and enthusiastic, a drink and another drink that offered to me not of which finísimo licor; that I drank with immense desire to have it between my arms, we spoke less of everything of us, in the end left until the door to dismiss to me, gave its fine, subtle, delicate hand me, woman hands, of Goddess, smoothly I attracted it towards my and a kiss of gull in flight I put in its lips and immediately I left, not if him taste or cursed my audacity, I did not watch backwards single walks. On the inside I took with me to it, his lips remained patches definitively mine.
That night more than ever I felt great, too great my bed, surprises it like never, I wished it like never, I adored it as one adores God. How it releases was that night, that distant was the new day, more than ever in my life I wished to return to see the sun, more than ever I wanted to return to see it.
November passed, cold in my conquest, December arrived, and I did not saw it during the first six days, the seventh day to the dusk I was decided to return to enter the house, looked for a pretext, a always enamored man has a reason to see the loved one; we were in Christmas and what better occasion than that to personally give to him to a present by the birth of the boy Jesus as it is the tradition.
It arrived until the door when it knew there of my presence. My eyes marvelled like that first time, like this molecule of life done woman meat could not be maintained always that glance, that matchless tenderness, that dulzura in each word bewitching that their lips left, we did not speak more than necessary with respect to my present of Christmas, I left.
Two days later I went to visit my friend with the intention to return to see it, but it was not, I felt a deep emptiness, because then she was not right to be that there behind schedule, she was not and I until felt jealousy and many confused thoughts happened through my mind; it had never asked if it had somebody that she loved, nevertheless, at that time I were made the question time and time again and until I thought that perhaps she walked with him, but felt an immense joy, an incomparable joy and a deep hope when Juan Manuel approached and said to me; it takes, that left you and was she! It whom she had had to me in his thought, had let with my friend a card of invitation to attend the celebration of Christmas with her I with her! she with me! , we two together ones! , that seemed to me lie, I with whom it stops my was unattainable! I with whom it stops my seemed impossible! And that dusk; I gave a recital in honor my and I applauded myself and I congratulated myself, had given to turn out my effort to conquer it.
The twelve of December were the celebration and that night I got dressed like king, clear was going to dance with the queen, the goddess. He was impeccable, I left to look for it. When arriving at the house I noticed an important detail, was not like the other women whom always there are to hope to that they are fixed; while one like a stupid idiot one, hopes single in the room or accompanied by which there he is for not dejarte only single, always I thought that that was a lack of respect.
Nevertheless, FLAVIA INES, was hoping to me neat, more beautiful there than a sprinkled flower of dew, imposing their figure and its beauty of goddess, with their pink dress of pronounced decollete, finísima silk and chifón that allowed to see this time its neck me. I can say that at that time I was the only important Earth man, happiest, nobody could be equaled to my, all watched to us, all murmured, all saw that like something incredible, incredible, never she has paid attention to anybody, in no, nobody described for then her and because he; people asked themselves although is seen so well together! They murmured soon.
That night we did not think about anything, nor about anybody. We danced, we ate, we drank, we talked of my and her. To the average night I went to the scene where was the orchestra and using my influences with
some musicians who knew me, I requested that they will let to me sing, was no disadvantage. When I began all stopped themselves to dance that bolero, she danced with my friend, I I dedicated to her the song, finalizing I said that she loved it, I to him I wanted that all knew that I loved it, she came me ago, and tenderly infinite it kissed my lips, his arms surrounded my neck and their eyes watched mine deeply, like wanting to express an infinite joy. Meaning I want to you.
In my life I will never have as happy days as those that I lived with her, because those days were part of my, of my being, I felt them, I touched them, I lived them on the most intense way, nobody it took care of so much to me, never nobody it tried to please to me as much, never nobody gave so much me.
All announced that that would not happen of first of January, that that relation was single a story of Christmas, but thus was not; other so many Christmases saw together plenty us of love and happiness.
With her I happened to be of subject to king, because I was from that twelve of December its omnipotente.
In the subsequent days we were not separated nor a moment I I could not be without her, she could not live without me and we loved ourselves. We loved ourselves, in the clear nights of January, the half days of every day, the average nights of all the nights, in the quarter, the rosal, the way, in the car, everywhere.
All type of relations in pair always has its hill above and its hill down; nevertheless the hill existed here never down, this love always stayed
it costs above.
We were one melodía that always stayed to the tone.
It was the paradise I her sacred hell, although I must admit that often I made things that hurt it, things that of being she a goddess would not hate to me by always, but the Gods single know the will the love, do not know to hate.
If to pardon and whenever I missed she pardoned to me.
I by causes of my terrenales human defects, often it did not give account me when my negative energies did damage to him, plus her all repaired it with the greatness of the divine love that stops my had in its heart. I loved it, without doubts that I loved it, but still my senses were clumsy, and it was impossible to me to know the greatness the love that lived in its heart, was not able to make a pact sacred and to fulfill it because my understanding was poor, vulnerable and volatile wanting to reach the Sky and Stars.
But thus I was, drain I fill of sterile thoughts, the possessed egos of the pride and the passion did not let see to me beyond the shade that projected my body. As I were going to understand that the one that it loves has left back the ego of hatred, the resentment, the pride, lujuria, the ambition, etc., and I was possessor of them. I loved it, but whichever limitations had in me. And now already nothing I can make to say to him that it always loves it… that always lands on water it.
Victor Suárez
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